Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Randomize
