your room smells of hookers.
And success
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
