Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
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