i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize