we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Randomize
