I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Randomize
