NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
