some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I could have mohawked her pubes.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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