yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
