the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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