whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Randomize
