It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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