ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize