Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
i think i just lost a toe
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
