i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
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i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
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I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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