I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
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