I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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