At least make sure they are 18
Why
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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