So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
