I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
