do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
