Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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