??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
