i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Randomize
