Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
