My nipple is on Facebook.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
