How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
