i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
