Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
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Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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