What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
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I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
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My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.