Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
