my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
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