How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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