gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
