Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Randomize
