he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Randomize
