5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
i need some magic done to my vagina
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
