lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
