i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize