We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Randomize
