So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
