You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
We need to get me chipped asap
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
