I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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