I'm gonna have a badass scar
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
