Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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