NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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