I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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