I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
