i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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