i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
