Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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