Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize