I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize